A Work in Progress

Yo Yo! :)

So, this evening, I was catching up on some reflection time. If you notice on my sidebar, I have a link to "3 Minute Retreats" which are really amazing, and calming - and I highly recommend them. Yes, they are from a Catholic source, but for my friends of different walks - its focus is NOT theology and unites us in scripture and God, and I've heard from a few friends how wonderful they have found them to be. If you have a need for some calm and a short escape from chaos, maybe you could give it a try? It has soothing music and images to help one focus. Maybe if you feel like you are searching for something, you may find it there.

That said - I'm SO bad at remembering to check it and when I do, I totally regret my forgetfulness and find myself going through each of the archives which goes back a few weeks. That is what I did tonight, as I ended my day with a 5 minute reflection (today's "pray" sacrifice, 3 X's today). Today's was WONDERFUL, but one of the past ones really caught my attention. It was titled "A Work in Progress". Since I've linked up to it in the previous sentence, I feel I can quote it below as well.

It really moved me. I am TOTALLY a work in progress. This blog came about as a way for me to process that progress. I use this blog to capture what I feel I do accomplish with my family and my life, when I feel so often I come up short. I use it to capture and convey positive thoughts, energy, and outlook - and so often for me (and a theme in my writing here) that comes back to faith. It's not that my life is all 'rosey' and perfect, or my faith never falters...I just choose to cling to the good moments and record them here to look back on. Sometimes it is more helpful than pure venting...but I do that as well. I fall often, and fall hard....and I need a place to remember my purpose here on earth for the BRIEF time I'm here, and writing out "loud" here on a blog others can read is such a release for me. It's not trapped inside me anymore.

So, that leads to this particular retreat. It's scripture verse was Philippians 1:6 - I am confidant in this, that the one who begun good work in you will continue to complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. I read that and I wondered....am I really a good work? When I feel I'm 'seeking' in all the wrong places sometimes, struggle too much, can't change in myself what I trip over the most, etc. I seek affirmation in many of my relationships when really there is only One that is suppose to affirm me. I also wonder what good got done in my day. How many of us feel that way? We may wonder as our day passes "what have I REALLY accomplished today? I don't see an end in sight in my home, marriage, job, family relationships, etc." It can bring the spirit down.

I go on to read in the scripture reflection:

These...words offer great hope. The confidence conveyed can bolster drooping spirits. We are each a work in progress, NEVER a finished product. As long as we cooperate with God's plan, the good work continues in us until the day we meet God face to face. We may feel stuck, or our life lacks purpose. Maybe we think we are too old to change our thinking, or too young to take on responsibility. But there is more to life than the present moment. We can be confidant God is at work in and through us and desires - and will bring about - so much more for us.

The bolded words are what spoke to me this evening. I believe in them, REJOICE in them, even when I know I've had, and will have again, even tomorrow, doubts about there being so much more to my life. I am NEVER a finished product. I need to love myself as I grow and progress forward. I need to look for the hidden or small blessings in my life that add up, and if I let them, enrich me. It really isn't God that lets things happen that seem against us, it is how we CHOOSE to view them, or live through the experience that can oppose us. We're never done, we're never finished, well...on earth. So we need to feel the peace in that. I need to, anyways.

The reflection goes on with questions for us to ponder:

Do I truly believe God is continuously at work in me?

and this one really stuck out at me:

What changes do I notice in my thinking when I remember other people are also works in progress ? (Hmm, that is one to blog about, or reflect on. Would I have more patience if I remember we all are progressing to something better than the moment we find ourselves in? I might find myself in a more positive frame of mind. I can tell you I let people get to me all the time, and wow...I need to work on seeing them as journeying as well, a work in progress - not perfect, or completed, and take comfort in that when I feel failed or let down. I also need to remember this when I feel I constantly let others down, and therefore feel the need to apologize a bit too much - though I feel so much better when I do.)

It ends with this prayer (or you can choose to say your own):

God of hopefulness and surprises, thank you for the good work you have begun in me. Grant me the grace to be patient with all that feels incomplete with me. Amen.

What hope I feel in my heart as I head to bed! I'm never going to be finished while on earth, so I need to do the best I can as I progress. I also need to forgive myself a little more while still trying to grow. I can't wallow, nor make excuses and stand still - but try again and grow closer to completion that will only happen when I leave this world. I need to love myself as I am loved, and help others feel loved as well in what they feel incomplete in.

So, goodnight - and I treasure the work in progress that is you. Be patient tomorrow with yourself, and like me...remember how special you are - keep progressing!

Sweet, sweet dreams!