Must Reads

As always, things are speaking to me this Lent. I have some must reads that have touched my spirit. I wanted to share them.

First - thoughts on parenthood and our children's behaviors by Kate. It was SO HELPFUL for me. I process and deal with a lot as a mom and how my children might reflect me and I struggle with confidence sometimes. I feel responsible for all the negative behaviors my children do, or dealing with children in my care.  Kate worded things well for me.  Two quotes stuck out to me in regards to parenting:

I also was able to let go of what another person, whom I don't know all that well, who happened to be the hapless target of my child's aberrant behavior would think of me as a mother or of my daughter. No one can tarnish your reputation except yourself. Others might catch your otherwise saintly child having a really bad day, and maybe they will think she's a beastly child and/or that you're a lax mother. So be it. Their thoughts are theirs. My thoughts are my own. I don't have to let what anyone says or thinks about me or my child impact the way we see ourselves or how I parent.

And this:

No one owes me their kindness or their understanding. I can desire this - that all people I encounter will see my children and me through God eyes and offer empathy rather than judgment - but I can't expect it. Unrealistic expectations have a sneaky way of coloring your life a disappointing shade of darkness. I'm a recovering perfectionist; I'm through with feeling like I'm always falling short in the eyes of others (or in the eyes of my hyper-critical self). I don't want my children to feel that way either.

She further states: 


If my child cannot tell me, as the most authoritative figure in her life right now, what she is feeling - even if it's a negative feeling directed toward me - then how will she be able to say no to her peers, to express just anger when someone wrongs her? How will she be able to speak up when someone does something that doesn't jive with her morality, to be assertive with her emotions and to not hide them away or deny them or let them erupt like a volcano when she's had it?


Excellent food for thought.


She said early in her post something I also am learning hard of late: "This is no way to parent. It's no way to live either. It takes the joy out of raising children. It makes every decision you make a test. It means you'll eventually collapse under the pressure. Trust me. I speak from experience." I know exactly what she means. I'm trying to keep my emotions from collapsing me as well.


If you've ever felt pretty blessed, but worry about the little crosses in your life - or when the big one will come - you might just be dealing with your cross more than you realize. The topic of this post is one close to my heart and one of constant prayer. I was led to read this post. Since I'm dealing with my anxiety issues, this post spoke to me greatly.  

This last one I'll quote from my "Little Black Book" for Lent.  It gave me great perspective on the Preparation of the Gifts during Mass. It is so much more than bringing bread and wine to the table and more than I had thought about giving TO Jesus.

First the reflection I read asked me to remember the story of the loaves and the fishes. When the disciples told Jesus all they had was a few loaves and couple of fish for the OVERWHELMING crowds, Jesus told them:

"Bring me what you've got." They did. Then he blessed the little they had, gave it back to them...and it was enough.

On any given day, we can say what the disciples said. We stand before all the needs that surround us - family, friends, job, finances, unfinished tasks, personal struggles - and say "Lord  I don't have what it takes." The Lord says to us, "Bring me what you've got." We do (the presentation of the gifts). And the Lord will bless what we bring, and give it back to us at Communion. And it will be enough. 

The bread and wine represent our life. We also bring forward money. This is not simply a matter of "paying the rent." Money speaks the hard language of real life. It comes from our wallet, our purse, our budget, our job. When we give this to the Lord, we are also giving of ourselves.

...It's not hard to "pray" the Preparation of the Gifts. We simply think of our struggle to deal with everything going on in our lives, and hear the Lord say, "Bring me what you've got." Then we place it all on the altar.  

Amen.